41. Quoteland :: Quotations By Author Books by and about dave barry Engrave a Quote Click this icon to engrave the quote on mugs, bookmarks, Click here for more information about dave barry http://www.quoteland.com/author.asp?AUTHOR_ID=142

42. CNN - Dave Barry - November 11, 1998 (CNN) Almost everyone looks at turning 50 with some trepidation, and humorist dave barry is no exception. Of course, to him, even midlife angst is one http://edition.cnn.com/books/dialogue/9811/barry/

MAIN PAGE WORLD ASIANOW U.S. ... news quiz CNN WEB SITES: TIME INC. SITES: Go To ... Time.com People Money Fortune EW MORE SERVICES: video on demand video archive audio on demand news email services ... pagenet DISCUSSION: message boards chat feedback SITE GUIDES: help contents search FASTER ACCESS: europe japan WEB SERVICES: DAVE BARRY Good things about aging: 205k WAV audio file 1.1Mb QuickTime movie On being 50: 210k WAV audio file 1.1Mb QuickTime movie Dave Barry's book "Dave Barry Turns 50" The guy in the place with the thing, you know... Dave Barry forgets Web posted on: Wednesday, November 11, 1998 6:56:50 PM EST (CNN) Almost everyone looks at turning 50 with some trepidation, and humorist Dave Barry is no exception. Of course, to him, even mid-life angst is one big joke. "Dave Barry Turns 50" is full of quips and cracks about the aging process. Barry recently appeared on CNN Sunday Morning. CNN ANCHOR LAURIE DHUE : Good morning, Dave, and thanks for being with us. How are you doing? DAVE BARRY : I'm doing fine for an old guy. DHUE : Yes, despite being, I believe 51, you look pretty good.

43. TMS Features (PHOTO For 2008, TMS is offering a CARICATURE of dave barry to accompany his (This classic dave barry column was originally published Oct. 14, 2001.) http://www.tmsfeatures.com/tmsfeatures/subcategory.jsp?catid=1014

44. Dave Barry On Choosing Your University Majors dave barry on Choosing your University Majors Fat Cult. http://www.fatcult.com/dave-barry-on-choosing-your-university-majors/

Read + Write + Report Home Create a site About Orble Sites ... Fat Cult E-mail Subscription Receive an e-mail notification of new posts on this site: Categories NEWS FUTURE PAST [ Not ] ... more Spotlight Posts Working From Home more Recent Posts Photographer takes pictures of his daughter for 32 years Starbucks is helping the small coffeehouses Cereal is Dope Bizarre German Gameshow? ... more Members Cibbuano charles Apply to write for this Site Popular Posts Photographer takes pictures of his daughter for 32 years Crazy grasshopper parasite is like an alien An unforgettable movie quote Starbucks is helping the small coffeehouses ... December 2007 Dave Barry on Choosing your University Majors Dave Barry was a humour columnist for the Miami Herald from 1983 to 2005... he won a Pulitzer Prize in 1988, which is quite extraordinary, considering that we was essentially a stand-up comedian on paper. Barry wrote a short piece on choosing a University major , and he basically put a blanket 'No' on any science field. " This means you must *not* major in mathematics, physics, biology, or chemistry, because these subjects involve actual facts. " On Math: "...you're going to wander into class one day and the professor will say: "Define the cosine integer of the quadrant of a rhomboid binary axis, and extrapolate your result to five significant vertices." If you don't come up with *exactly* the answer the professor has in mind, you fail."

45. Dave Barry Faq No, not dave Who, dave _barry_. dave barry is a syndicated columnist whose humorous articles appear in hundreds of newspapers every week. http://isc.faqs.org/ftp/faqs/dave-barry-faq

Path: senator-bedfellow.mit.edu!bloom-beacon.mit.edu!news-out.internetmci.com!news.internetMCI.com!newsfeed.internetmci.com!198.138.0.5!newshub.northeast.verio.net!arclight.uoregon.edu!newsserver.pacific.net.sg!seletar.ap.deuba.com!newsserver.pacific.net.sg!news.uoregon.edu!cs.uoregon.edu!news.sgi.com!news-peer-west.sprintlink.net!news-peer.sprintlink.net!news.sprintlink.net!cpk-news-hub1.bbnplanet.com!chicago-news-feed2.bbnplanet.com!news.bbnplanet.com!uwm.edu!uwvax!muenster.cs.wisc.edu!msteele From: msteele@muenster.cs.wisc.edu (Michael Steele) Newsgroups: alt.fan.dave_barry,alt.answers,news.answers Subject: alt.fan.dave_barry Frequently Asked Questions Followup-To: alt.fan.dave_barry Date: 21 Jul 1998 12:33:48 GMT Organization: U of Wisconsin CS Dept Lines: 1170 Approved: news-answers-request@MIT.Edu Expires: Mon, 31 Aug 1998 00:00:00 -0400 Message-ID:

46. News Writing Interviews: Dave Barry On Humor dave barry On Humor OTHER COLUMNS What makes me laugh when I read other people s columns is the idea that they re getting paid to write them. No. http://www.learner.org/catalog/extras/interviews/dbarry/db02.html

Dave Barry On Humor OTHER COLUMNS What makes me laugh when I read other people's columns is the idea that they're getting paid to write them. No. I like a lot of other people's columns. I mean, I like almost any humor that I did not personally have to produce. When you write, your own humor never seems funny to you when you're done. It seems very depressing, because you spent so much time over everything, and you're not very secure about it. So you generally end a column thinking, "This is really not a humor column, this is something you would use to console a widow with." I read everyone else's humor columns and I almost always laugh at them. Not out loud, 'cause I'm not an out loud laughing kind of guy. But inwardly. Well, like living humor columnists right now? The guy who made me laugh the most of all is dead. Is Robert Benchley. I always wanted to be like Robert Benchley. Um, not in the sense of being "dead." I'd like to be Robert Benchley, but not dead. Living, there's lot of humor columnists, Roy Blount Jr., I love, Colin McEnroe, James Lilac, P. J. O'Rourke, lotta guys that are writing now, I really like. Joel Achenbach! I would have mentioned him, but he's a close friend of mine, and I don't want to embarrass him by suggesting I read his columns.

47. Jim’s Joke Repository - The Toilet Police, By Dave Barry The Toilet Police by dave barry. If you call yourself an American, you need to know about a crucial issue that is now confronting the U.S. Congress (motto http://www.jimpoz.com/jokes/toiletPolice.html

The Toilet Police by Dave Barry. It makes sense. People want it. So come on, America! This is your chance to make a difference! Stand up to these morons! Join the movement! Speaking of which, I have to go flush. Forwarded from Matthew Lippis.

48. Rollerblade Barbie By Dave Barry Rollerblade Barbie by dave barry Copied from Colorado Springs Gazette Telegraph, Sunday, July 17, 1994 As executive director of the Bureau of Consumer Alarm http://philip.greenspun.com/humor/rollerblade-barbie

Rollerblade Barbie by Dave Barry Copied from Colorado Springs Gazette Telegraph, Sunday, July 17, 1994 As executive director of the Bureau of Consumer Alarm, I am always on the alert for news stories that involve two key elements: 1. Fire 2. Barbie So I was very interested when alert reader Michael Robinson sent me a column titled "Ask Jack Sunn" from the Dec. 13, 1993, issue of the Jackson, Miss., Clarion-Ledger. Here's an excerpt from a consumer's letter to this column, which I am not making up: "Last year, my two daughters received presents of two Rollerblade Barbie dolls by Mattel. On March 8, my 8-year-old daughter was playing beauty shop with her 4-year-old brother. After spraying him with hair spray, the children began to play with the boot to Rollerblade Barbie. My little girl innocently ran the skate across her brother's bottom, which immediately ignited his clothes." The letter adds that "There are no warnings concerning fire on these toys ...I feel the need to warn potential buyers of their danger." In his response, Jack Sunn says, cryptically, that "Mattel does not manufacture Rollerblade Barbie any more." He does not address the critical question that the consumer's letter raised in my mind, as I'm sure it did yours, namely: Huh? I realized that the only way to answer this question was to conduct a scientific experiment. As you may recall, last year, in response to a news item concerning a kitchen fire in Ohio, I did an experiment proving that if you put a Kellogg's strawberry Pop-Tart in a toaster and hold the toaster lever down for five minutes and 50 seconds, the Pop-Tart will turn into a snack-pastry blowtorch, shooting flames up to 30 inches high. Also, your toaster will be ruined. The problem was that I did not have a Rollerblade Barbie. My son happens to be a boy, and we never went through the Barbie phase. We went through the Masters of the Universe phase. For two years our household was the scene of a fierce, unceasing battle between armies of good and evil action figures. They were everywhere. You'd open up the salad crisper, and there would be He-Man and Skeletor, striking each other with carrots. So at the end of a recent column, I printed a note appealing for a Rollerblade Barbie. I got two immediately; one from Renee Simmons of Clinton, Iowa, and one from Randy Langhenry of Gainesville, Ga., who said it belonged to his 6-year-old daughter, Greta. ("It would help me if you could get Barbie back to north Georgia before Greta notices she's gone," Randy wrote.) Rollerblade Barbie is basically a standard Barbie, which is to say, she represents the feminine beauty ideal, if your concept of a beautiful female is one who is six feet, nine inches tall and weighs 52 pounds (37 of which are in the bust area) and has a rigidly perky smile and eyeballs the size of beer coasters and a one-molecule nose and enough hair to clog the Lincoln Tunnel. But what makes this Barbie special is that she's wearing two little yellow Rollerblade booties, each of which has a wheel similar to the kind found in cigarette lighters, so that when you roll Barbie along, her booties shoot out sparks. This seems like an alarming thing for Rollerblades to do, but Barbie, staring perkily ahead, does not seem to notice. To ensure high standards of scientific accuracy, I conducted the experiment in my driveway. Aside from Rollerblade Barbie, my materials consisted of several brands of hair spray and this was a painful sacrifice a set of my veteran underwear (estimated year of purchase: 1968). I spread the underwear on the driveway, then sprayed it with hair spray, then made Rollerblade Barbie skate across it, sparking her booties. I found that if you use the right brand of hair spray I got excellent results with Rave Rollerblade Barbie does indeed cause the underwear to burst dramatically into flame. (While I was doing this, a neighbor walked up, and I just want to say that if you think it's easy to explain why you're squatting in your driveway, in front of a set of burning underwear, surrounded by hair spray bottles, holding a Barbie doll in your hand, then you are mistaken.) At this point, the only remaining scientific question I'm sure this has occurred to you was: Could Rollerblade Barbie set fire to a Kellog's strawberry Pop-Tart? The answer turns out to be yes, but you have to be in the act of hair-spraying the Pop-Tart when Barbie Rollerblades over it, so you get a blowtorch effect that could very easily set fire to Barbie's hair, not to mention you own personal self. Plus you get tart filling in the booties. So we can see why Mattel ceased manufacturing Rollerblade Barbie. I imagine that whichever toy designer dreamed up this exciting concept has been transferred to Mattel's coveted Bosnia plant. But what should be done about all the Rollerblade Barbies that are already in circulation? I believe that the only solution is for all concerned consumers to demand that our congress-humans pass a federal law requiring that all underwear, snack pastries and other household objects carry a prominent label stating: "WARNING! DO NOT SPRAY HAIR SPRAY ON THIS OBJECT AND SKATE ROLLERBLADE BARBIE OVER IT!" But that is not enough. We also need to appropriate millions of dollars for a massive federal effort to undo the damage that has been done so far. I'm talking about scraping this crud off my driveway. Also, the taxpayers owe Greta a new Barbie.

49. Language Log: Dave Barry, Linguist But Bryan Curtis sent up a balloon at Slate about dave barry taking over for William Safire at the New York Times. Curtis pretends that this is about http://itre.cis.upenn.edu/~myl/languagelog/archives/001800.html

Language Log Main January 14, 2005 Dave Barry, linguist Dave Barry is retiring from journalism in order to devote himself full time to linguistics. Well, that's not quite right. He's been more of a humor columnist than a journalist. And he's being coy about his future plans. But Bryan Curtis sent up a balloon at Slate about Dave Barry taking over for William Safire at the New York Times. Curtis pretends that this is about socio-political commentary, with Dave in line to become the Times' resident libertarian. But surely what's really on the table is replacing Bill's On Language column with Dave's Ask Mister Language Person In academic settings where language is discussed, the Mister Language Person columns are already cited more frequently than any other modern source, with the possible exception of The Simpsons . At the University of Otago in New Zealand, for example, there is a course on "Writing for Psychology" whose entire section on "Mechanics and style of writing" consists of links to eleven Ask Mister Language Person columns, five additional Dave Barry selections on punctuation, and a poem (apparently not by Dave Barry) about the

50. An Elegy For Dave Barry. - By Bryan Curtis - Slate Magazine dave barry, who quit his syndicated humor column last week, has been playing dumb for 22 years. Whenever someone suggests that barry is our noblest social http://www.slate.com/id/2112218

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51. Barry, Dave - MSN Encarta barry, dave, born in 1947, American humorist and writer best known for his weekly newspaper column, which is syndicated to more than 500 newspapers . http://encarta.msn.com/encyclopedia_701610419/Barry_Dave.html

var s_account="msnportalencarta"; MSN home Mail My MSN Sign in ... more Hotmail Messenger My MSN MSN Directory Air Tickets/Travel Autos City Guides Election 2008 ... More Additional Reference Materials Thesaurus Translations Multimedia Other Resources Education Resources Math Help Foreign Language Help Project Planner ... Help Related Items Humor Journalism more... Encarta Search Search Encarta about Barry, Dave Also on Encarta Secret students What colleges really want Famous misquotes quiz Advertisement Barry, Dave Encyclopedia Article Find Print E-mail Blog It Barry, Dave , born in 1947, American humorist and writer best known for his weekly newspaper column, which is syndicated to more than 500 newspapers. He has also written more than 20 books, a number of which have been bestsellers. Dave Barry was born in Armonk, New York, where his father was a Presbyterian minister. Barry was voted Class Clown of his high school in Pleasantville, New York, when he graduated in 1965. He then majored in English at Haverford College in Pennsylvania. After graduating with a B.A. in 1969 he worked as a reporter for The Daily Local News , a small newspaper in West Chester, Pennsylvania. Barry also taught business writing for eight years. In 1983 he began reporting for

52. News From Me - August 20, 2001 · EXTRA! By Mark Evanier. POV Online Tribute article to a littleknown comedian and cartoon voice actor. http://www.povonline.com/2001/News082001a.htm

PREVIOUS NEWS NEXT NEWS WHAT YOU SEE above is a bad picture taken from the cover of one of Dave Barry's comedy records. This is not the Dave Barry who presently writes a syndicated humor column. This is the other Dave Barry, and he passed away recently. Here's the AP wire report... Actor-Comedian Dave Barry Dead at 82 The comedian, who was not related to the Miami-based humorist of the same name, was born in New York City and started his career at age 16 on radio's "Major Bowes and the Original Amateur Hour." He moved to California in the early 1940s and served in the Army during World War II entertaining troops. Toward the end of that decade, Barry began performing in Las Vegas at the El Rancho Hotel. He was featured at the Desert Inn in a revue called "Hello America." He opened for Newton for more than eight years. Barry had television and film credits, most notably in Billy Wilder's "Some Like It Hot," in which he played the role of Beinstock, the band's manager. In the latter part of his career, he entertained on cruise ships and appeared in the "Follies," a Palm Springs, California, variety show. It also doesn't delve into his not-inconsiderable work as a voiceover artist. He did his first cartoon work for Famous Studios when that operation was still based in Florida. Barry (who was then going under the name, Dave Siegel) was playing at a hotel in Miami. A man from the audience approached him at the bar after the show and said they needed someone to do the voice of Bluto...so Barry played Bluto in

53. Dave Barry, Personal Appearances,dave Barry America s Personal Appearance Source For dave barry Other World Class Speakers. http://www.barberusa.com/humor/barry_dave.html

dave barry Telephone: 1-865-546-0000 Fax: 1-865-673-4680 E-Mail: info@barberusa.com Motivational Humorists SEARCH SITE PERSONAL APPEARANCE INQUIRY E-MAIL A COLLEAGUE Dave Barry Barry's father, The Rev. David Barry, was a Presbyterian minister... Barry has often cited American humorist Robert Benchley as an inspiration... The TV sitcom Dave's World was based on Barry's writings. It ran on the CBS network from 1993 to 1997; comedian Harry Anderson played Dave... Barry played guitar in the once-in-a-while band The Rock Bottom Remainders, made up of authors including Stephen King and Barbara Kingsolver... In awarding Barry its 1988 prize, the Pultizer Committee cited his "consistently effective use of humor as a device for presenting fresh insights into serious concerns"... Barry is no relation to the author David Barry (also born in 1947) who wrote Women and Political Insurgency: France in the Mid-nineteenth Century. Top General Information Home Site design and maintenance by Cale Web Design

54. Dave Barry: Mr. Language Person Lowers The Boom - International Herald Tribune Join us now for another rendition of Ask Mr. Language Person, the only grammar column mentioned by name in the Bible. http://www.iht.com/articles/2004/10/08/features/bar9.php

Culture iht.com Business Culture ... Search Dave Barry: Mr. Language Person lowers the boom Published: SATURDAY, OCTOBER 9, 2004 MIAMI: Today in Culture Sundance: New American realism emerges amid grousing and Hummers Rambo: Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the jungle A. This is why Mr. Language Person carries pepper spray. Q. Is it time to coast to the end of the column with examples of effective language usage sent in by alert readers? A. Yes: Got a question for Mr. Language Person? Just boom it in our ear in a honky-tonk fashion. Back to top Home Culture Most E-Mailed 24 Hours 7 Days 30 Days As Suharto clings to life, Indonesians draw mystical connections ... Davos: On the cusp of economic history Complete coverage from the World Economic Forum: U.S. candidates promise different sort of global engagement Video: Former founder defies gloom Emulating the EU, countries join forces Blogs: Globespotters Urban advice from reporters who live there. google_ad_client = "ca-iht_js"; google_ad_channel = "article"; google_ad_output = "js"; google_max_num_ads = "4"; google_safe = "high"; google_adtest = "off"; google_language = "en"; google_encoding = "latin"; google_ad_type = "text"; google_ad_region = "article_body"; google_page_url = "http://www.iht.com/articles/2004/10/08/features/bar9.php"; Search News: Americas Europe Asia - Pacific Sports Features: Culture Travel At Home Abroad Blogs ... Weather Business: Business with Reuters World Markets Currencies Commodities ... Funds Insite Opinion: Opinion Home Email the Editor Newspaper Masthead Classifieds:

55. Dave Barry On Meetings dave barry on Meetings. To really succeed in a business or organization, it is sometimes helpful to know what your job is, and whether it involves any http://www.dt.org/html/Meetings.html

Reader's Digest, September, 1986 Dave Barry on Meetings To really succeed in a business or organization, it is sometimes helpful to know what your job is, and whether it involves any duties. Ask around among your co-workers. "Hi," you should say. "I'm a new employee. What is the name of my job?" If they answer "long-range planner" or "lieutenant governor," you are pretty much free to lounge around and do crossword puzzles until retirement. Most other jobs, however, will involve some work. There are two major kinds of work in modern organizations: 1. Taking phone messages for people who are in meetings, and 2. Going to meetings. Your ultimate career strategy will be to get to a job involving primarily No. 2, going to meetings, as soon as possible, because that's where the real prestige is. It is all very well and good to be able to take phone messages, but you are never going to get to a position of power, a position where you can cost thousands of people their jobs with a single bonehead decision, unless you learn how to attend meetings. The first meeting ever held was back in the Mezzanine Era. In those days Man's job was to slay his prey and bring it home to Woman, who had to figure out how to cook it. The problem was, Man was slow and basically naked, whereas the prey had warm fur and could run like an antelope. (In fact, it *was* an antelope, only back then nobody knew this.)

56. Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize-Winning Columnist / Satirist - Free IQ For speaking engagements or more information on dave barry , contact the American Program Bureau at 1800-225-4575 or Click Here for dave barry s profile at http://www.freeiq.com/davebarryvideo

Home Learn More Affiliates Add Your Content ... Help Popular Tags: family golf investing ecommerce ... Get the Flash Player to see this player. Login to review! Login to share! Report a Problem Login to add to favs! ... Share URL With Web Link URL: Click Here For Embed URLs Embed code for MySpace Embed code for MySpace (with autoplay) Embed code for other systems Embed code for other systems (with autoplay) Dave Barry, Pulitzer Prize-Winning Columnist / Satirist by Dave Barry Video 00:06:36) "I'm a newspaper humor columnist, which basically means what I do is I sit around in my underwear and make things up. It's a lot like being a consultant..." CLICK HERE for additional information on Dave Barry at The American Program Bureau website Dave Barry Miami, FL Expertise: Humor, Writing View All Dave Barry's Content For speaking engagements or more information on Dave Barry', contact the American Program Bureau at 1-800-225-4575 or Click Here for Dave Barry's profile at APBSpeakers.com. Dave Barry is a humor columnist for the Miami Herald. His More...

57. Authors On Tour - Live! » AOT #28: Dave Barry Podcasts Money Secrets dave barry, the bestselling humorist and Pulitzer Prize winner for his commentary and columns for the Miami Herald, reads from and discusses his hilarious http://authorsontourlive.com/?p=50

58. Standback's DAVE BARRY Page!!! Fan page with quote file, reviews of dave s books, and compiled lists of mottos and good names for rock bands. http://www.geocities.com/Athens/Troy/9987/

Standback's DAVE BARRY Page Your browser does not support frames. To view the site, please click here

59. What's In Your Gadget Bag, Dave Barry? dave barry has inspired many young writers showing that with hard work and enough dick jokes a person can win. http://gizmodo.com/gadgets/gadgets/whats-in-your-gadget-bag-dave-barry-035057.ph

var pageType = 'post'; So much in love with shiny new toys, it's unnatural. NEW YORK, 2:42 AM, SAT JAN 26 RSS Tip your editors: Editor: Email Features Editor: Email Senior Associate Editor: Email AIM Associate Editors: Email AIM Email Email Contributing Editors: Email Email Email Email Columnist: Brendan I. Koerner Editorial Assistants: Email Email Interns: Email Email Gizmodo next In Brief What's In Your Gadget Bag, Dave Barry? Dave Barry has inspired many young writers, showing that with hard work and enough dick jokes, a person can win a Pulitzer Prize. When we found out Mr. Barry is a man who likes his gear, we asked him what's in his gadget bag, and he answered: The main thing I carry in my gadget bag is about 28 different power converters. I don't know what they're all for: Some of them date back to the early 1990s. But if I ever need to recharge a notebook computer that I no longer own, I am READY. The current working computer that I usually carry on the road is a Sony PCG-TR3A. I like it because it's small and light and has decent battery life. It has lousy speakers, so if you want to watch a DVD on it, you need headphones. I have a Sprint network card that plugs into my notebook so I can get on the Internet anywhere. That is the good news. The bad news is, it's pretty slow. It is just now receiving radio signals originally broadcast by Marconi. My phone is a Treo 600. It's a bit too big, but I like that it syncs easily with my computers, and it has everything in it contacts, calendars, email, and a really, really bad camera, which I call "The CrapCam." I take pictures on it and post them to my blog, mainly because the quality of the photos enrages the blog readers and causes them to rant in an entertaining manner. I'm thinking of getting the Treo 650, which apparently has a better screen. But it also has a better camera, and I don't know that I'm prepared to get rid of the CrapCam.

60. Dave Barry's - Complete Guide To Guys Official Website Official website with synopsis, cast and crew biographies, and multimedia. http://www.guidetoguys.com/

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